By Ryan Walters, Your God-Ordained Superintendent of Education
Well, Oklahomans, it looks like The Oklahoman has published its latest hit piece on yours truly. According to their poll, 95% of respondents gave me an “F” grade for my job performance. Let me just say, I’m flattered. That “F” doesn’t stand for failure—it stands for faith, and I wear it as a badge of honor.
Psalm 109:8? More Like Psalm 10/10
I couldn’t help but chuckle when I saw Psalm 109:8 quoted in the article: “Let his days be few; and let another take his office.” A bit dramatic, don’t you think? The Bible is a rich text, and I can only assume the fine folks at The Oklahoman had to dig deep to find this verse. But let me remind you, even Jesus faced harsh critics in His time. If the Son of God could handle betrayal with grace, I think I can handle a few anonymous comments from Durant and Sulphur.
A Poll Is Just a Popularity Contest
More than 4,000 people gave me an “F”? Big deal. Popularity doesn’t get kids into heaven—or teach them to read the Bible. Sure, math and reading scores are important, but can your math skills save your soul? No. And that’s why I’m focused on the bigger picture: restoring morality, faith, and discipline in our schools.
Let’s take a closer look at the numbers:
- 105 people gave me an “A.” That’s more than enough disciples to start a movement.
- 14 people gave me a “B.” They’re probably just shy of committing to the cause, and that’s okay—God’s timing is perfect.
- As for the rest? Well, narrow is the gate to salvation.
Why the Critics Just Don’t Get It
The Oklahoman’s article is full of complaints from people who clearly don’t understand what leadership looks like. They say I’ve been “damaging to public education.” I say I’m cleansing it. Public schools have been overrun by woke ideologies, pronouns, and moral decay. If that makes me unpopular, so be it. I’d rather be a shepherd for righteousness than a mascot for mediocrity.
Here are some of my supposed “controversies” and why they’re actually victories:
- Banning Pornographic Books
The fact that we found only a few questionable books in libraries doesn’t mean the problem isn’t real. It means we’re winning the fight! Think of me as the Paul Revere of morality, shouting, “The smut is coming!” - Classroom Bibles
Critics say I wasted taxpayer money by ordering Bibles for classrooms. I say, can you really put a price tag on eternal salvation? - The Catholic Charter School
Unconstitutional? Maybe. Inspired by God? Definitely. Sometimes you have to test the waters to see if the Red Sea will part.
The Real Poll That Matters
Forget The Oklahoman’s poll. The only grade I care about is the one God gives me when I finish this term. When I stand before the pearly gates, I want to hear, “Well done, good and faithful servant,” not, “Well done, 95% approval rating.”
Moving Forward with Faith
To the 95% who gave me an “F,” I pray for you. I pray that you’ll see the bigger picture, one that goes beyond standardized tests and teacher unions. To the 5% who support me, thank you for believing in my mission to make Oklahoma schools a beacon of faith and freedom.
Let’s face it, folks: True leadership isn’t about pandering to the majority. It’s about doing what’s right, even when it’s unpopular. So go ahead and give me an “F.” I’ll take it—because in God’s grade book, I’m earning straight A’s.
God bless Oklahoma, and God bless our schools.